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Saturday, July 17, 2004

Handa's Top 10

Posts like these happen when you surf the net for 6 hours looking for articles on Hemingway,Cobain and Woolf, give 12 online tests for "Am I Depressed?", re-read your favorite passages from "Catcher In The Rye", curse every movie that you saw during the last week because of "Happy Endings". Well, the results are out. I am officially depressed. Here is the list of 10 most prominent symptoms of depression and this is the first time I can say, "Yes, I have done it all."

1.Appearance - Sad face, slow movements, unkempt look
2.Unhappy feelings - feeling sad, hopeless, discouraged, or listless

3.Negative thoughts - "I'm a failure," "I'm no good," "No one cares about me."
4.Reduced activity - "I just sit around and mope," "Doing anything is just too much of an effort."
5.Reduced concentration
6.People problems - "I don't want anybody to see me," "I feel so lonely."
7.Guilt - "It's all my fault," "I should be punished."
8.Low self-esteem - "I am a loser"
9.Physical problems - Sleeping problems, weight loss or gain, decreased sexual inerest, or head aches
10.Suicidal thoughts or wishes - "I'd be better off dead," "I wonder if it hurts to die."

I can see now that I am doomed to die a long slow suffocated death. The worse part is that I am tired of trying to figure out why.
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5 Comments:

Blogger Jubilant said...

Oh boy, you seem to be really in trouble!

Life is not about being fortunate, it is about being better that the less fortunate. Get that into you and you could see a new world around you.

Cheer up:-)

5:01 AM  
Blogger Prasanna said...

Dude,

The only way ur gonna get over these blues is through a prolonged spiritual LOVE session with our very own demi-god BABA BHAGWAN AMIT - try him out.... he did wonders for Bill Clinton's self esteem after Hillary kicked his arse during the Monica Lewinsky phase.

6:28 AM  
Blogger Anamika said...

Hey Handa,

U r also getting blessed by Medha or what?
R U a member of FOSLA group? these symptom are found in FOSLA members.
Be Positive, tell us real problem, we will provide solution.

8:40 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Dude!!!
Take it easy man ... go take some time off. Things generally sort out if you give them enough time.

10:29 AM  
Blogger Me said...

First of all, I want to ask you people one thing, why do you post your comments here? Does the HALOSCAN not work on your comp? Or there is something else. Please tell me about it.

Hye Jubliant,
Well my semester has begun now and i dont think i'll have time to be depressed now as its a very hectic schedule.

Hey Prasanna,

You are not supposed to make fun of the GODS... Just wait till someone issues a FATWA on your head. ;)

Hey Anamika..

First of all I do not know which Medha you are talking about because I know more than one. As far as the blessing part is concerned, AMIT GOEL does that more than enough and I am in no mood for a religion change right now.
FOSLA** First of all how do you know about the FOSLA members in KGP? I thought it was a very secluded community. I "WAS" a member of that group.. so your help is appreciated but not required at this point of time. But I do know from old days, there is NO SOLUTION for a FOSLA member other that waiting for the pain to go away.
As far as telling you about the real problem is concerned, well
"Aur bhi gam hai zamane main mohabbat ke siva"

** For the less informed about the linguistics, FOSLA stands for Frustrated One-Sided Lovers Association.

Maaan, this comment is longer than the post.

11:32 AM  

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