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Wednesday, May 31, 2006

Seven Words Every Guy Wants To Hear

Fine FINE!! I Love You. Now Go!

Tuesday, May 30, 2006

Hey Bhagwaan!!!

Ek koi dhang ka movie dikha do... Pehle DVC aur aaj FANAAAAAA... kyun??? aakhir kyun? meri galti kya hai? kis paap ki sazaa de rahe ho mujhe. ab Tom bhi acting bhool gaya hai? Aamir bhi lichhad scripts pe movie bana raha hai. utha le bhagwaan.. utha le.. mujhe nahin.. tom aur aamir ko.

Friday, May 26, 2006


News Update on the romantic front: Ayn Rand is not the only female author I love.

Thursday, May 25, 2006

One of these is a lie.

I am too intelligent to know what love is. I think I know what it entails, but I don't feel anything.
I wish I could regulate my feelings.
I wish there would be a zombie outbreak because I'd be so much better prepared than everyone else.
I did so many horrible things when I was younger, I was not a good person and I fear I will never be forgiven for all that I have done. I fear I will never forget all that I have done.
Hurting other people makes me feel good about myself. The power I can have over their emotions is fucking amazing.
I never called her back because I wasn't attracted to her, at all. In all other aspects, she was the perfect girl. How shallow am I?
I don't have the guts to kill myself, so I keep wishing for some kind of nasty cancer that kills you quick. That way it wouldn't be my choice, and wouldn't be an egocentric bastard who leaves my family with guilt.
I would sell out everyone and everything to live another week.
I love money and everything I can do with it.
I lie. A lot.
The only thing that has kept me alive, is knowing that things can always get worse.
People think I care, but I don't give a shit.

Wednesday, May 24, 2006

It is not about the reservations.

Make no mistake about it. Its been executed with such finesse,it can put the state controlled pogrom in gujarat to shame-wonder if there is some training ground where they learn these dexterous skills. But then, one gets better, with practice. And its not just wine that gets better with age. To dismiss this as vote bank politics would be being courteous. To call this an exercise in futility would be well, churlish. To credit it as a master stroke,err, nothing would be further away from the truth. Truth is, this is a failure of imagination. Yeah, its a dismal failure of the senses because we take pride in having the largest written constitution on the face of this earth. It is a farce because we say that it took us many long years to sow the seeds of liberalization since we are a calibrate democracy, a vibrant democracy at that. It is a sham because we say that free speech and expression is the cornerstone of our egalitarian society. Yea,Like hell it is.

Let me then, enlighten you, Honorable Minsiter of HRD, Shri Arjun singh,that dissent is what distinguishes communist China from democratic India. A Hitler from a Nehru. A rigid fascist from a liberalist. A despot from a meritocrat. Hell, when George Bush-,the redoubtable foot in the mouth exponent- visited Great Britain, and tens of thousands of angry protestors assembled in front of the Buckingham Palace, to protest his presence in their country, all he could say was that he loves going to a country where there is freedom of speech; dissent. Affirmative action, dear sir, can be imported later. Learn the rulings of democracy first. Take away dissent, and we are as good as dead.

And I am not yet drawing myself into the debate of whether the government should or should not uphold the bill seeking the 49.5 reservation. For its not about the reservation at all. Reservations, beloved sir, are a manifestation of a form of anachronism, which was shameful even in a society which prevailed in your prime. And the anguish, the despair, the despondency, and the desolation are a function of this utterly shocking and reprehensible proposal . That fifty eight years into the life of a nation, we still haven’t imbibed the first imperative of democracy. I can almost hear the founding fathers quiver in their graveyards.

I was thrilled, delighted even that interns and medical students my age stood up for what they thought was right. For no cost is too high to stand up for what one thinks is right. Kids my age who have little to do with this imbroglio, many of them ,who will either join elite hospitals or head abroad, kids who have nothing to gain and everything to lose, risk their careers, their lives. For the uninitiated, a doctor cannot apply for a visa or practice, if she has a police statement against her name.

They voted with their feet and you lathi charged them?. They protested in a silent , non violent manner, and you thumped them with 3rd gear water cannons? They stood up for equality and you tear gassed them? Its quite some time since holi and quite some time left for diwali, but never mind. In more ways than one, you have invoked our collective consciousness. We knew our generation was up for it. You helped us prove it. And lest, you misunderstand us, this is no flash in the pan. When you flushed them out, they formed a huddle. When you canonized them, they held on to each other for their lives. When you detained them,they didn’t even so much as to raise a whimper. When their futures were being decided by god forsaken cops,they couldn’t think of influential names to bail them out. And sir, perhaps, what was the last nail in the coffin, was when you arrested 6 of them, an overwhelming 400 of them quoted mass arrest.

And perhaps, we don’t have much to lose. Let me correct myself then. How many of you in the government would want your grand children to be delivered by mediocre doctors? How many of you would want to come under the knives of surgeons who got through on reservation grounds. Terra Firma. How many of you would want your intestines and kidneys removed by well, at best, ordinary doctors?

We learn from history that we learn nothing from history. And if history repeats itself and yet what happens catches us off guard, how incapable are we of learning from our mistakes. Our best doctors- Naresh Trehan, Pratap Reddy- and the like are all great men not because they hail from a Tulu or an Iyer background, but inspite of it.

Even as I type this, a rather buoyant news reporter claims a probe has been ordered and I quote NDTV here. “The Deputy Chief Minister of Maharashtra has ordered a probe after police use batons to disperse anti-reservation activists.”

A Probe? Prime time televison disemminates live pictures of students being attacked, battered and bruised. And you order for a probe? You don’t trust your eyes! Ahh…fitting, aint it?. Or else I would have been forced to believe that human beings can commit such heinous,atrocious fallacies. Yet again, this is not an effort to stem the rot. This is a charade. A farce. A bloody travesty.

And Sir, if you still can’t hear us, let me assure you that the screech is going to get shriller. Today we ve got to the streets; Tomorrow we are going to be in the south and the north blocks. We will fight with every last inch of determination left in our souls, every last drop of blood left in our bodies.

Thanks to people like you, we have arisen from what is seemingly a long , long siesta. Thank You sir for leaving us with no choice but to take the future of this nation in our collective hands. It’s thanks to you that we are potentially at the cusp of what is seemingly an awakening of a generation. Indeed, thank you sir for making us realize our strength of character. Yea,finally, We ve stopped existing. We ve started living.

This sums up the mood really- ( quoted by a friend who was a part of the protests)
"chadha do gaddi....kya farak padta hai....seat to le hi lee hai....ab jaan bhi le lo.

Now you know why Rang de Basanti was as big a phenomenon as it turned out to be. You don’t play with our self respect Mr.Singh. I understand you successfully implemented a 49.5% reservation in Madhya Pradesh a couple of decades back. Lightning strikes just once. And yeah, what goes around comes around. Except that, its your turn to be hit by the collective thunder.

In conclusion, all I would state is, even after having said what I have, I would still want you to have a peaceful twilight of your life. So heed the call of a generation.A generation which will not let merit become a victim of whimsical eccentricity.A generation which will be celebrated for its resurgence and tenacity. A generation which will not take things lying down. A generation,clearly, whose time has come.

Else, kindly keep off from the morning walks. Like I said, Rang de Basanti is cult. And to us, defence minister ho, ya human resource, kuch farak nahi padta.Amen.

---- guy_next_door82
I got this in a mail forward and by far it is the best that I have got.

Monday, May 22, 2006

DVC The Movie

There is only one possibly reason that I can imagine because of which anyone would like The Da Vinci Code, the movie, can be that he has not read the book and is totally unaware about how the story proceeds. For the record, I liked the book as much as I liked the movie Die Hard and if you do not understand what I mean, then do not read any further, as probably you would not understand that either. However, the movie is, for the lack of a better phrase, a piece of dog turd. May be the version I saw had something missing, but I am glad for that because I could not tolerate it any longer. If you are looking for a plot summary here, I suggest you go and read the book and take my word, it would be time well spent.

Everything about the movie is right (actors, director, story) but still it manages to fail miserably. It is hard to imagine that an above average actor like Tom Hanks could not display more than one emotion for 88.72 % of the movie, which was of bewilderment. May be he was thinking, "What the hell happened to me? I used to act." I thought that Tommy boy could not be miscast in any role as he is decent enough to adapt to any character but clearly he has proven me wrong and that too by a huge margin. Audrey looks good in the movie but for me to like a girl in the movie either she should act or should have big boobs, and clearly she did not make the cut. Ian McKellan was probably the only good thing in the acting department or may be he looked good because of comparison. Paul Bettany, who was trying to play an Opus Dei assassin, looked more like a Bond villain. Ron Howard, again a man who was perfectly suited for the role of a director, failed to deliver miserably. I very strongly wonder if his ideas about making a thriller were clear or he was taking a lesson from Abbas-Mustan. At this point I am thinking, "Whether Abbas-Mustan would have done a better job?" I cannot come to a clear conclusion and that is possible only if he did a real lousy job.

The long narratives at times are necessary but they are extremely bland. At times it is so boring that Joey would pull his arm out so that he would have something to throw at the screen. I was very close to doing it but I didn't because I was afraid that the monitor would break. Ron did stay faithful to the original source, which turned out to be a mistake. In the end, DVC is as entertaining as standing in a queue to withdraw money from SBI (Branch Code 202) for 149 minutes. On second thoughts, at the end of the queue you at least feel happy because of the money in your hand.


Sunday, May 14, 2006

Question Of The Day / Week / Month / Post / Whatever...

What would JESUS do?

Friday, May 12, 2006

Some good shit I found while surfing...


Tuesday, May 09, 2006

Am I The Only One?

  • I have never seen a bald man in my life and by bald, I mean really totally completely bald and not balding, and I also do not mean voluntarily bald because I myself have been under the razor more than once and boy.... were those days chilly. My grandfather still has 77% of the surface area of his head covered at 77. However, if I am friends with Parijat for 3 more years, I am quite sure that I won't be able to repeat the above statement.
  • I have never been hugged by anyone and anyone includes my parents, family, friends and girlfriends. There have been the "you-did-good hugs" and "before-make-out hugs" and "oh-damn-i-am-seeing-you-after-a-long-time-so-i-feel-compelled-to-hug-you hugs" but there has never been a hug which is just a hug and what a hug should be.
  • I have never been to a New Year party, of any kind. As a kid, I was too young to go to those parties. As a teenager I classified all parties, especially the ones which had Dr. Handa on the guest list as extremely boring ones. As an overgrown kid, I never got the opportunity.

And yeah, Kumar was right. It DOES make your Johnson look bigger.
And yeah, none of you noticed literotica or chose not to mention it in comments to my last post? One of my wingies mentioned it to me today and even I was surprised that how did I slip.

Wednesday, May 03, 2006

Say WOW!

Solving a Rubik's Cube is much harder than it looks. Give it a try.